How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
