Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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