I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
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She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
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And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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