someone owes me an orgasm
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
