I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
If I die, sorry about rent.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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