I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
