Duck Duck Cougar?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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