youre lurking in front of me
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
