Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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