better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
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i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Of course I have a pirate flag
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I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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