Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize