your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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