I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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