3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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