I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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