so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
worst night to have a conscience
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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