I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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