he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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