I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
