TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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