She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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