I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize