Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
My dick has a subreddit
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
