You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
