Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
