ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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