On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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