he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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