They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
