I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
