I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize