it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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