it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
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