I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize