I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
