Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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