We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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