big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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