I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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