So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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