the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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