u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
