I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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