Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
