covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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