you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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