I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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