I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Come see our sink grown plant.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm like, not good at living.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
