she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Text me some of your sweat
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