Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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