sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
